Post by Deirdre Flanagan on Dec 25, 2010 22:57:11 GMT -5
This is where we rant about things, so it doesn't muddy up the rest of the board. And also, it's nice to commiserate about things together.
I'm going to start things off with a rant about my otherwise nice Christmas.
So, it started out fine. I was about to see a movie with my brother, though, when we had a fight.
I'm pretty much copy/pasting this from my chatlog with a friend:
so, my brother wanted to go to True Grist and was offering a ride. He then said, "Oh I won't be paying for you, you'll have to ask Dad for money" after making me say I was broke. Then after I said I was going, he asked, "Do you have money?" I said "Yes" "Where did you get the money?" "Dad." And he made me repeat that over and over, to the point where I got a bit upset. The thing is, Matt gets on my case for not having a job all the time and generally just criticises everything I do. So, sure, me getting upset and saying I wasn't sure if I wanted to go was a bit of an overreaction. But then I kept telling him why that bothered me and that I wish he'd be more careful about what he said, and he said, "I can only control how I feel about things." Which is a lie, you can't REALLY control how you feel about EVERYTHING, you can just repress it. So I said, "You can also control what you say and what you do." Which made him mad. And he got this look on his face like "I know you're right but I don't want to admit it". Really I just hit a nerve. And I didn't even say anything below-the-belt, just that he should be more conscientious of how what he says affects people. I never said he needed to be likable or care what people thought, just that if he cared about people he should try to not hurt their feelings.
And I said, "So, maybe if you know that upsets someone, you shouldn't say it. Maybe if you care about someone you would not want to hurt their feelings." He said, "I don't care about what people think of me or their feelings" and then kept on saying "You're not listening to me!" He also kept on saying "I do think about what I say" when I asked, to which I said, "So you choose to frequently say rude things to get a rise out of people?" He had no answer. I eventually said, "NO, you're not listening to ME" and he actually said, "I am listening to you, you're just wrong"
afterward I said I'd drop the issue because it CLEARLY wasn't going anywhere and I'd just go to the movie, and he was all, "Now I want to go alone" and left my sister and I behind while he went. And then didn't respond to our texts/voicemails when we kept calling him and calling him to see if he'd come to dinner with us.
To be honest, I'm not actually that sad he didn't show.
So that was my Christmas. Sure, at first my sister sort of blamed me for us not going to a movie she wanted to see, but she realized how she was sounding and apologized, and we talked a bit. So that was nice. But, that's my brother for you. If you ever need a good example of his assholery, there we go.
I also would like to add that he once lied to my parents and said I stole $300 from him when I didn't, so I would pay him back and get a job.
He's...special. He will show up frequently in my complaints about my family.
I'm going to start things off with a rant about my otherwise nice Christmas.
So, it started out fine. I was about to see a movie with my brother, though, when we had a fight.
I'm pretty much copy/pasting this from my chatlog with a friend:
so, my brother wanted to go to True Grist and was offering a ride. He then said, "Oh I won't be paying for you, you'll have to ask Dad for money" after making me say I was broke. Then after I said I was going, he asked, "Do you have money?" I said "Yes" "Where did you get the money?" "Dad." And he made me repeat that over and over, to the point where I got a bit upset. The thing is, Matt gets on my case for not having a job all the time and generally just criticises everything I do. So, sure, me getting upset and saying I wasn't sure if I wanted to go was a bit of an overreaction. But then I kept telling him why that bothered me and that I wish he'd be more careful about what he said, and he said, "I can only control how I feel about things." Which is a lie, you can't REALLY control how you feel about EVERYTHING, you can just repress it. So I said, "You can also control what you say and what you do." Which made him mad. And he got this look on his face like "I know you're right but I don't want to admit it". Really I just hit a nerve. And I didn't even say anything below-the-belt, just that he should be more conscientious of how what he says affects people. I never said he needed to be likable or care what people thought, just that if he cared about people he should try to not hurt their feelings.
And I said, "So, maybe if you know that upsets someone, you shouldn't say it. Maybe if you care about someone you would not want to hurt their feelings." He said, "I don't care about what people think of me or their feelings" and then kept on saying "You're not listening to me!" He also kept on saying "I do think about what I say" when I asked, to which I said, "So you choose to frequently say rude things to get a rise out of people?" He had no answer. I eventually said, "NO, you're not listening to ME" and he actually said, "I am listening to you, you're just wrong"
afterward I said I'd drop the issue because it CLEARLY wasn't going anywhere and I'd just go to the movie, and he was all, "Now I want to go alone" and left my sister and I behind while he went. And then didn't respond to our texts/voicemails when we kept calling him and calling him to see if he'd come to dinner with us.
To be honest, I'm not actually that sad he didn't show.
So that was my Christmas. Sure, at first my sister sort of blamed me for us not going to a movie she wanted to see, but she realized how she was sounding and apologized, and we talked a bit. So that was nice. But, that's my brother for you. If you ever need a good example of his assholery, there we go.
I also would like to add that he once lied to my parents and said I stole $300 from him when I didn't, so I would pay him back and get a job.
He's...special. He will show up frequently in my complaints about my family.